Home > Politics > Always proofread your writing….

Always proofread your writing….

Barack Obama needs to edit his work

As you know, BDK is unemployed, but occasionally tutors a poor high school soul on how to write stuff. One of the things I remind them to do is proofread their work, its strange because after I skimmed over Barack Obama’s Inaugural Address, it was rife with the silliest mistakes. It was a such a grandiloquent and lofty speech I couldn’t pass these errors over. Thus, I made some edits so hopefully those who caught the errors can get a better picture of what he really wanted to say. Here’s an excerpt of what I have so far. (Inserts are underlined.) Excerpt of rough draft can be found here…..

Speech

Now, there are some who question the scale of our ambitions, who suggest that our system cannot tolerate too many big plans. Their memories are short, for they have forgotten what this country has already done, what free men and women profligate congressmen and congresswomen can achieve when imagination reconciliation is joined forced for common Democratic purpose and necessity for courage backdoor political deals.

What the cynics majority of Americans, fail to understand is that the ground has shifted beneath them, that the stale current political arguments that we have consumed us ignored for so long, no longer apply because Nancy and I refuse to listen to them.

The question we ask today is not whether our government is too big or too small even bigger, but whether it works bribes, whether it helps families find jobs at a decent wage,care they can afford, a retirement that is dignified. whether it helps give Rep. Jim Costa an unfair allocation of water, present Rep. Suzanne Kosmas more NASA funding, and gives Rep. Bart Gordon $100 million of other people’s money.

Where the answer is yes, we intend to move forward. Where the answer is no, programs will end balloon uncontrollably in size.

And those of us who manage the public’s dollars will be held to account freely given to congressmen without convictions, to spend wisely more money, reform bad habits, and do our business in the light of day utter secrecy, because only then can we restore the vital trust between a people and their government pass this monstrosity of a bill.

Nor is the question before us whether the market government is a force for good or ill that nobody in their right mind can now f*** with. Its My power to generate take other people’s wealth and expand diminish freedom is unmatched. 

But this crisis healthcare bill has reminded us that without a watchful eye, the market government can spin out of control. That is why I have removed the watchful eye. The nation I cannot prosper long when it favors only the if I listen prosperous the majority of the American people.

The success of our economy my government has always depended not just on the size of our gross domestic product a genuflecting media but on the reach of our prosperity Chinese-funded debt; on the ability to extend opportunity pork to every willing heart spineless politician– not out of charity, but because it is the surest route to our common good the legacy of both Nancy and me.



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Categories: Politics Tags: ,
  1. Mike Nahum
    March 22, 2010 at 5:54 pm

    Nice.

  2. orijinalbrand
    March 22, 2010 at 5:56 pm

    lol. nice!

    p.s. check the blog for thoughts my father shared with me yesterday.

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